Our marriage story began in 2011. Within a year, we were blessed with a beautiful baby girl. But our marriage became low priority as other life responsibilities took over. After some time, we were just passing time together instead of investing in our marriage. My husband pursued another relationship which eventually led to our divorce.
Through the divorce process, we each began seeking God more, individually. We had our own small groups and communities who built into us as individuals. Yet, we did not have a community who knew us and loved us as a couple.
My husband grew closer to God as our divorce was being finalized. He was baptized; he was transformed. He felt a strong sense that God was directing him to me, and while I supported him, I had no interest in trying to make our relationship work. The world was telling me that divorce was the answer so I continued through that process.
After our divorce was finalized in early 2015, we were content leading separate lives. He still felt God had plans for us, even though I insisted we had no future.
One day, I heard God more clearly than I ever had before. He told me to go back to my husband—that he was the man I had prayed for and God was guiding him. This moment was life changing. I knew he was a changed man, but that did not erase the hurt and betrayal. And God wanted me to go back to him and trust Him that he was in control.
I was obedient and we began a new life together following God. We remarried later that year (the same year we divorced). We joined a Huddle together and he even went to MAN CAMP. We were and still are committed to our marriage and keeping God at the center.
Fast forward to Couples Camp:
During camp, we had a time of individual solitude. God spoke to each of us, guiding us in the same direction. I heard God tell me to let go of control. To trust my husband and trust Him. The fears I carried from feelings of betrayal led me to be controlling in nearly all aspects of our marriage. I felt at peace knowing my husband was following God and growing us closer to Him. At the same time, God was telling my husband to step up and be a Godly leader of our family.
Since our divorce, I felt a sense of shame that we took that route. Couples Camp was the first time that I felt true peace about our story. I don't necessarily mean that divorce was the answer, but what I realized is that even though we divorced, Satan didn't win! Divorce wasn't the end of our story. God prevailed because he is bigger than our marriage problems, bigger than affairs, and bigger than anything we can possibly go through in our marriage. We have a new story of redemption and forgiveness that came from obedience to God, that we wouldn't have known otherwise.
I realize now the importance of a community who is FOR our marriage. Perhaps our story would have been different if we had a community who loved us as a couple and encouraged us to work through the struggles. I don't know how things might be different, but what I do know is that we will be those people who pray and encourage the married couples in our life. We know firsthand how God can bring redemption and will always fight for marriage.